Veinte amigos,

The first weekend of the 2005 college football season is officially in the books. First off a moment of silence for former ESPN sideline reporter Adrian Karsten, who took his life over the weekend in Minnesota. And then a moment of silence for loudmouth ESPN analyst Trev Alberts, who failed to show up for work on Sunday and flushed his career down the proverbial toilet. Dumbass.

A third-rate team from a second-rate conference administered a first-rate beating to a Top 10 team on Saturday (that's TCU, Conference USA, and Oklahama if you're scoring at home). ... Auburn officials are probably still wondering if Bobby Petrino is available for an interview. Even if he isn't, I'm sure the boosters are more than ready to fire up a jet and make the trek to Louisville. ... Rutgers spent more time in Illinois territory than the Illiniwek tribe did before they were wiped out. ... The tOSU, UT, and UM games were rather uneventful. Each team needed a cupcake to gear up for their respective Top 20 matchups this week. ... USC rolled and, given their schedule, I'm not sure who is going to beat them in the regular season. ... Florida, Georgia, and Iowa dominated, continuing the theme for the SEC and Big 11 throughout the weekend. ... The Domers won at Pitt, much to my dismay. Enjoy the ass-kicking in the Big House this weekend. ... FSU had a flashback to the 90's, except this time it was Miami who was botching special teams plays. ... And finally, Texas A&M coach Dennis Franchione elected to go for an extra point instead of a two-point conversion after going up by 1 late in the game against Clemson. They made the extra point to go up 24-22, only to have the Tigers drive down the field and win the game on a last second field goal (final score: 25-24). For this bit of brilliance, Mr. Franchione will "earn" approximately $1.75 million this year.

The following link should keep you entertained for awhile. Check it out to see which rapper most resembles your school's football team.
http://sexy-results.blogspot.com/2005/07/school-spiritms.html

I'm heading out this weekend to catch the Texas - Ohio State matchup at the Horseshoe on Saturday night. When Ted Ginn or Santonio Holmes catches a fade route in the end zone, look for the idiot 11 rows up decked out in orange Illini gear (assuming the fans in the section haven't already beaten me to a pulp by then, in which case my bloody red shirt will blend in with the rest of the crowd). That's also assuming the tOSU QB is capable of throwing a fade route. Go Bucks?

Buena suerte to all, and Go Illini!

CRT, PhD
Official Ron Zook for President Campaign Manager